Guide to Graduate Scroogedom, Part 2

A good portion of how you deal with your finances is psychological. That’s why the second part of my guide to Grad Student Scroogedom is about dealing with the psychological aspects of managing finances and living frugally and within your financial means. Personally, this is the largest part of my financial concerns: how I think about them, how I deal with the stress, and how I avoid letting my stress lead to overspending.

The Psychological Aspects of Scroogedom

1. When you want to buy something, wait. I will admit that I used to think this piece of financial advice was, well stupid. But I have really discovered the utility of it. Whenever Husband and/or I want to buy something, we wait. A lot of the time, we’ll find that we don’t really want the item as badly as we did after some time has passed or we realize we didn’t need the item as badly as we wanted. On the other hand, when you find something that resurfaces over and over again as something you “need” to buy, then it probably is a legitimate need. For example, I’ve wanted a new dresser for ages, but I’m living without it. However, the need for a new couch arose again and again so eventually we got one. I have an ongoing list of things I want, and every so often when I’m looking for a way to reward myself for a job well done, I pull something off of it. A lot of the time, however, I find that eventually I delete items because I don’t really want them anymore. The only exception to this is when you find something you know you want/need and it is ridiculously cheap – then don’t wait!


2. Accept that financial problems will arise and there is nothing you can do about them. Unfortunately, grad school is going to bring with it financial difficulties. They are uncontrollable. Cars break down, pets get sick, etc. These things will be unavoidable so when they do happen, try not to stress too much about the fact that they happened or you couldn’t afford them. This is often easier said than done, but having financial goals and a safety net can make this easier. I always have space on my credit card should an emergency happen (e.g., my car needs repairs or I need medical care, etc.) and these are easier for me to accept knowing I have that plan. My attitude is that my credit card is for emergencies and I’ll accept that unexpected expenses will arise. Unfortunately, life doesn’t pause for graduate school, as much as we wish it all did!


3. Lower your financial expectations for graduate school.
One of the most frustrating aspects of the financial limitations of graduate school is the incongruency between where you expect to be in your life at X years old, and the fact that you must continue to live as a student. Or, in some cases (mine for example) you’re financially much worse off as a graduate student than you were as an undergraduate! Saving money will be very difficult in graduate school as will any large purchases. I would love a new car, because mine is pretty old, but I know that this financial goal is not reasonable for me on my budget. As much as I would love to completely pay off my student debt and graduate debt free, I know that I can’t manage that on my budget. Once I stopped beating myself up for these “failures” my stress decreased. My financial bar is now lower and more realistic (and you will have to decide what is realistic for you). Being able to cover all of my bills on my own pay check and manage a little bit of savings is as much as I can manage, so I am happy if I can do that.


4. Be thankful for the things you can afford. I don’t really do this as much as I should, but part of finding peace and de-stressing about finances can be to focus on the positive. Every so often, be consciously thankful for the things you can afford. I can afford health care, insurance for my car, and fresh vegetables. As common as these things might be in my life, others might not have them.


5. Learn to let go of guilt about being frugal. I wish I could say that this is something I had under control. I’m aware of my need to improve in this area. This item could just as easily be called “Avoid buying into other people’s guilt about your frugality!” Most of the guilt that I have is about having to decline invitations to spend money with others. Don’t get me wrong – I’m not a complete killjoy – but week after week of eating out for dinner, or grabbing lunch, is just not how I want to spend my money. I’ve easily had many weeks where I spent $20/week+ on dinners or lunches with other people “just because.” That adds up quickly to $80/month (which is a good portion of my gas budget) and a whopping $960/year. I’d much rather eat dinner out as a treat or a celebration than out of boredom. But people who have more disposable cash as I do, or who aren’t perhaps as careful with their money as I am, often have a hard time understanding why I am declining invitations. I walk the line between confidence in declining and guilt/embarrassment with great difficulty. Remind yourself that some people won’t understand. I personally can also easily feel embarrassed declining invitations because I can’t afford to spend the money. But really, if someone doesn’t understand, that’s their problem, right? Good friends won’t embarrass you about your finances.


6. Keep your eyes on the prize. When you set a financial goal, remind yourself about it when necessary. When I feel upset about not being able to buy myself something I want, I remind myself that I am saving for X. I often ask myself – will I remember this dinner out 1 year from now? Or would I much rather put that $20 toward X? Remembering what your saving for (And having a goal to save for in the first place) can make saving that much easier.


7. Re-spin your Scroogedom with eyes toward the future. Focus on the future. This doesn’t mean only focusing on your financial goal, but also focusing on why you’re living like a Scrooge in the first place. When I am feeling particularly panicked about my cash flow I remind myself that I am in graduate school, that I am spending money to make an investment in myself and my future, and that it will pay off in the long run. Have people around you who will help you with this spin if needed. When I can’t alleviate this stress on my own I have three people to call: Husband, my mother, and Eccentric Friend. “Remind me that this will pay off in the end!” I say, as soon as they answer the phone. They know that is their cue to repeat my mantra for me: I am in graduate school, I am spending money to make an investment in myself and my future, and it will pay off in the long run!